*
Blood light
It was Halloween and three vampires went into a saloon and bellied up to the bar. "What will you have?" the bartender asked.
"I'll have a glass of blood," the first replied.
"I'll have a glass of blood, too, please," said the second.
"I'll have a glass of plasma," said the third.
"OK, let me get this straight," the bartender said. "That'll be two
bloods and a blood light?"
*
A boy coming back to school says to his mother:
- Mom, mom, our teacher is a vampire!
- Why do you think that? - asks mother.
- She said to us to wash our necks!
*
A man was passing by the cemetery all in fear but he was relief and very happy when he met another one who said to him: I was scared passing here by while I was still alive too.
*
A vampire asks for 100 rolls in a bakery.
- Why you need it so many - asks a baker.
- Well, my girlfriend has her period and I need something to dip into.
*
At midnight a man in a dark blue coat was walking in the cemetery. Suddenly he saw an arm reach out from the grave and heard the voice: They buried me alive!
- And not very good! - he replied and walks away.
*
Father and a son are sitting on the table and eating.
- Daddy, is we vampires? - asks a son.
- Shout up and drink until is curdling!
*
A vampire has caught a goldfish. She said that she'll come true just one his wish if he lets her go. He said how he wants to drink only women's blood. So the goldfish turns him into Always Ultra.
*
A vampire was digging in the garbage. Another vampire has seen him and asked:
- What are you doing?
- My son is ill and I'm looking for the tampons to make him some tea.
*
In life you should seek to become a vampire. That's the only way to have a drink on some other's bill.